This is as far as we've gotten in our story so far, but we are far from the end. This journey is far from over. Through this week of posting, I have received several messages from several people who have their own infertility stories to share. My goal has been to encourage other women to share their stories, and they have, so I consider this to have been a success.
I don't know what God has in store for us. I'm not sure if he intends for our family to grow larger, or if maybe we need to wait a bit and learn some lessons first, or if our family is now complete. I guess there's really no way to know that. I suppose that years from now, if we have three children or if we don't, we will know the answer. Scott and I have been holding on to Jeremiah 29:11: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. This has been comforting to us for the last 14 months, and will continue to comfort us for the rest of this journey.
Happy reading :)
Wednesday, 03 April 2013
However, I do know that I have released at least a few eggs, since I've conceived. So, until we get my hormone levels back next week, I'm not really sure what's going on. The first thing I think of is PCOS (poly-cystic ovarian syndrome), but like I said, we'll wait for the doctor to interpret my results before I start any rumors :)
That's all for now...
Tuesday, 09 April 2013
Nothing is wrong.
I should be happy about this, but honestly, I'm devastated. I was banking on being able to find something that could be fixed, but there is nothing that needs fixing. I kept thinking that if only we could fix something, then all our problems would be solved, and I'd be able to carry a baby to term. Maybe I'd need some progesterone or clomid or something and things would be ok.
But now, there's nothing we can do except keep trying to get pregnant. Who knows how long that will take, and there's a much bigger risk that I'll miscarry again. On the one hand I don't want to go through that anymore. On the other hand, our family is not complete. We are not all here yet.
So, I think we'll go forward. I think we'll continue trying, running the risk of breaking our hearts over and over again.
We can do this.